2 weeks in - lessons learned

Well, we've been in Tulyehualco almost 2 weeks now. I believe we are beginning to adjust to life here - at least the best we can as "foreigners." We still get plenty of stares as we walk through town (which is literally right at our doorstep). Thankfully, we don't have to go far for the food we need to buy on a daily basis for our meals. Much of the time we are here in the house - working, talking with our family, eating, cooking, reading, cleaning, emailing, and Skyping (for those technically advanced individuals...not me). It's not bad to have all this time here; it's just different from what we've experienced before in other places.

While I'm always surprised at how much things seem to be similar to our culture, there are also so many differences. These differences are sometimes very difficult to get used to and at times are starting to wear on me. I am learning some things about myself - too many to include all of them here. However, I do want to share a few with you - for what they are worth.

1. I've recognized my ability to adapt to change fairly quickly, but I don't like it for very long - after the newness wears off it's sometimes difficult, even when the situation is great.

2. Ten weeks is a long stretch of time to be away from family and loved ones. Prayers and support from a distance are helpful, but nothing replaces the "physical" touch or presence of those special people in our lives, especially when you're living in a culture where love is physically expressed so much more. (I don't know how I ever would have survived serving in Africa with the Peace Corps for 2 years!)

3. I don't know or understand what this trip is supposed to be about for me. I feel as though I'm learning things about this and that, but nothing that seems to come together as this flashing bright light illuminating the way - indicating "this is why you are here!" I've accepted the fact that this trip could be exactly what it was intended to be and no more - a time to experience another culture and learn the language. I guess what I mean by that statement is that sometimes things may happen in our lives just because they do. There may not be any real reason or significance behind it - it's just an experience we have in our lives that may not really connect with anything else. I'm not saying this is what I feel about my time here - as just a 10-week trip in Mexico, but I just don't know that it's not either. Normally, for me, it's all about connecting the dots to discover the next path God wants me to take. So far, that's not happening here...which leads me to another point...

4. I do a really poor job comprehending true humility, especially when my patience is being tried so often. Right now, as we adjust to this new culture, I am having difficulty accepting these changes as ones we will live with for the next four weeks or so. It's not that the people here aren't hospitable (if anything they have given so much just for us to be here - especially our family.) Yet, it is still hard, but maybe that is because I know what a different life is like and how our life here might be more comfortable - instead of just accepting this (humbly) and moving on with my concerns about the differences. As someone who likes things in a near "perfect" order, this trip is teaching me the humility to recognize that there are many right ways of doings things - whether I would choose to do something in this way or not.

5. Generally speaking, I am a pretty patient and understanding person, but there are things here that I just don't get and don't seem to have the patience to understand. Yet again, it is simply a difference in culture. And just because we do it differently in the U.S. doesn't really mean anything at all.

6. I believe part of the lessons of humility are helping me appreciate things more at home. Again, not that there are right and wrong ways of living life, but I often forget just how good we have it. While we experience struggles just like the people in Mexico, we have resources (financial, human, physical, etc.) that the people here will never understand or attain. I have found this to be the case, especially in the church. One of the big differences in where we are serving and some of our churches at home is that we (in the U.S.) have willing people and ample money to fund our mission work both in the U.S. and abroad. For the people of this church here, service is not a priority because people have no time or money. I have experienced this first-hand as it takes so much time just to cook for a family and clean up after each meal. Imagine doing all that in combination with other "real" jobs that earn money. Additionally, people here tend to have much harder physical demanding jobs that don't offer much in terms of "free" time. As for money, many times, there is no more money for extra things - even those things that are just as necessary as paying bills. And so you go without until you get paid again. I suppose some of this really sounds no different than what many of us in the U.S. experience, but still, there is something different about those hardships here. While many of the Mexican people really want to find ways to help themselves and each other here, I feel a strong urgency to find ways to advocate for and support these people in the ways that we can, but especially with those most needed gifts of time and money.

7. And finally, language and culture really can be a barrier to relating to people - that seems fairly obvious, but try it out sometime to see just how difficult it can be. Even with our broken speech and limited knowledge of the culture, we often have difficulty really getting to the heart of the matter with people here. As someone who enjoys people, listening to their stories and their problems, it is very difficult for me to sit and listen knowing much of what they are saying I will never understand. As a result, I will never fully be able to respond. I guess this is just another example of when my patience runs out because of my need to have things just right. While I may have missed out on building deep relationships with people in the church because of the language barrier, I believe this same frustration and challenge is what has taught me (and continues to teach me) that it's not about how much (to learn or do or speak) or how fast (things can get done - like sermon writing), but it's about opening yourself up (through good times and bad) to hear God speaking (not in Spanish or in English) in a way that we all can understand...in a patient and humble manner, knowing that what we hear comes in God's time and God's place. In that time and place, God will reveal what is necessary for us to know - about this trip, about other things in my life. It's one thing to recognize this; it's another to actually believe it and follow it. The good thing is that I still have four more weeks to go.